The month of May has been an emotional rollercoaster… Last Thursday, I ended up at Children’s hospital with my sweet little Olivia struggling with a bad viral infection and pneumonia. For the next three days, I watched her breathe, on off, through a breathing tube. She cried, she was miserable and kept saying, “I just wanna go home”. We got home Sunday, on Mother’s Day (best mother’s day gift ever). The family was whole again. Two days later, I found myself here again with her twin sister, working even harder to breathe. When they talked about ICU I broke down in tears. She’s doing okay now, watching TV and eating pancakes, only needing oxygen here and there. I don’t know if you’ve ever been to the hospital, watching your little angel struggling to breathe, wires and tubes attached to her little face, hand etc. Let me tell you, it’s heartbreaking… But it’s also very life-affirming. It makes you think about life and gratitude. It’s as if times stands perfectly still and all your precious moments flash before your eyes. It quite the “spiritual journey”, like a mental spring cleaning. I’ve made a lot of mental notes about what I want to change–like I want to be more present, I want to play more with my kids, be a better role model, I want to treasure every single moment with them. Of course, we all know this but experiences like these truly remind us. Life is fragile. Life is wonderful! Of course, it also makes me think about my new book, Holding on to Hurt, a story about a mother fighting for her son’s life–at the hospital. And here I am, surrounded by mothers, worry and fear painted on their tired faces. I’m right here where Imagined my main character, Irene would sit with her son in an induced coma. I met a woman in the family room on Sunday and said “Happy Mother’s Day”. She smiled and said,” it is indeed”. And then she told me that her son had just woken up after 35 days. “A miracle” she added. I tell you, I almost broke down in tears and then we hugged for a very long time–me and this woman I have never seen before. The bond and power of motherhood are strong. And that is why I initially wrote this story. But that’s only half the truth. I’ve been wanting to write this story ever since the tragic Sandy Hook shooting but I wasn’t ready to write it then. It was too emotional…. I’m scared to death of all the school shootings that take place almost every week across the country. To ever image that something like this could happen to my little angels, Alfred, Emma, Olivia… I can’t even find the words. As you can tell, this story is very close to my heart–especially after what I’ve been through and the troubled souls I’ve met this last week at the hospital.
You can learn more about the book and why I wrote it here on the page.
“Happy” reading ❤️